Christmas has always been associated with Finances this year. Whenever I think about Christmas or celebrating the holiday, I think about people buying gifts, or simply just buying things with $$$. It's an odd holiday this year, because I haven't decorated, celebrated it, or even given much thought to it. Believe me, I don't really feel a connection to this particular holiday anymore, and it might be because I simply refuse to spend any money. However, I might come around to simply sending some e-cards to people, or making creative cards online to send people. But I think I'll simply do the cards if and only if I really feel its worth my time. I think just going around and telling people Happy Holidays is best for now.
But in spite of whatever emotional gratifications people get from the Holidays, and whatever people can convince themselves of regarding the holidays... it still comes down to finances and spending money. I can say that right now, things are slowly starting to get better financially, and it wasn't a big setback helping a so-called friend out yesterday... however I did convey my disgust towards that person for not being a better friend towards me.
I don't really know what the point of Christmas is anymore, its not really a holiday or a celebration... its just nonexistent to me. However, I will admit that because I'm emotionally withdrawn from people, it could be that I'm simply unable to connect or understand the importance of Christmas anymore. Or could it be that I simply see Christmas from a different point of view... and not about celebration but about spending.
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