Last Night, I came to a devastating realization regarding my journey through life which is that I've been very complacent in life, and I've been complacent for years. I'm not entirely sure when my complacency started, but I know it’s been around as early as 2006. The evidence of that complacency can be viewed through my education, career, and music... even aspects of my relationships and friendships can be seen as complacent. The realization of this came earlier in the day when my boss said... "None of this is rocket science" when he was getting frustrated with me because I had forgot something he had told me before regarding a task. I have a lot of respect and admiration for my boss, and in some odd ways I look up to him as well, because he has such a great mind. But he also sees aspects about me that I don't believe others have seen or been willing to express towards me. Basically, Chris doesn't hold back any punches he gives it to me straight and that is the way I prefer people to be towards me in life. And through our many conversations, I came to a very painful discovery... I believe I'm devolving at a very rapid pace. I'm not motivated, driven, or have a real purpose to make leaps and bounds in my life, and I have to be honest with myself about the issue which is I haven't been happy with the direction my life has been going in over 6 yrs. There are days I feel like I'm on the Titanic or that I'm in a prison of my own design... either way, I've come to the sad discovery that if I don't start snapping myself out of this journey of complacency... I will continue to be unhappy and miserable everyday.
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