Sudden Episode

Last night I had another episode... I lashed out at my wife and I know I hurt her feelings again. I understand and know why I had an episode, but I refuse to even discuss that reason on this blog site. I just know that I have to get rid of things so that one vice is no longer influencing me. It sucks because I really enjoy the vice a lot, just relaxes me, allows me to be naughty for a bit... but whatever... better to be rid of it so it no longer has me dealing with the consequences of behaviors or decisions... plus maybe I won't have to experience the guilt any longer.