Embracing Fear

It's always the unknown consequences that can make fear someone's best friend, fear can hold us hostage to progress, growth, and happiness. And I use to think I was the person that could overcome fear and make the hard choices in my life, however I think I might have deceived myself. Deception can come in many forms when it comes to our way of thinking, and often times we think we can make changes ourselves and that we know what is best for our lives. In some cases we can make changes ourselves because we know what is best for ourselves, but in some cases when we are constantly or continuously fighting off depression, low self-esteem, or even FEAR... we have to look elsewhere for help and assistance. Shit keeps coming up... that has been my phrase for 2011, and even though I'm not 100% sure, I think it was my phrase in 2010 and 2009. Shit doesn't just happen, it takes time... it takes routines, habits, and constantly working within a certain bubble that we ourselves have created out of a false sense of safety.

I realized over the weekend that I haven't taken the necessary amount of risks to make the kind of progress that is needed in order to be happy, and I'd be lying if I said I was truly happy in my life. In fact, I'm miserable in every aspect of my life... I don't know what true happiness is anymore, because I've simply allowed myself to float myself through life and live with just getting by. I don't want to simply survive anymore, I want to overcome and make the kind of responsible decisions that bring life and excitement back into my life. But before I can allow for that excitement, it seems I have to force myself to go through the fires of being uncomfortable and change.

Change should be uncomfortable, but it shouldn't be based on fear... we shouldn't be afraid to make changes and move forward in life. And I truly believe that sometimes we have to embrace our fears in order to overcome them. It's almost October, and I want to start making changes. I've made some changes but they are limited and small... its progress... but the only way it will be meaningful progress is once I'm able to say I've been consistent in moving things forward.

Wish me luck!