Shifting...

It's always been about focus, commitment, and perseverance. I can't be partly in things, I can't just ride my bike when I feel like it, or be 50% involved in educating myself and learning new skills, or sort of determined in paying off my debts. I have to be 100% focused on what's in front of me.

Yesterday, there was a business decision to fire our facility manager... this was a shock only because he was doing excellent work and I guess they wanted to bring in the former facility manager for whatever reasons they decided to come up with. I'm not privy to the real reasons for the changes. But the manager that got fired he was nice and friendly to everyone, maybe he had a different way of doing things and management felt that his style wasn't good for this facility. Either way, he was let go... and it sent shudders down my spine because someday that could be me. And if I lost my job, I question my own skills and if I'd be able to find myself another job that pays what I'm making now.

I don't want to wake up one day and have all these regrets on my mind, I thought I could handle it, but I can't handle another day of being the type of person I've been in the past. I have to want more, I have to desire more, and I have seek out more. I know it's a complacency issue or just a fear of change, but something has to change or more problems will arise that I won't have a chance to fix. So I'm shifting focus, moving towards a more active and busy lifestyle. I want to get my hands dirty, I want to take more risks, and I just want to go after what I really want.

I just have to hold onto my motivation and not lose any it... and that aspect is very hard.