Sometimes you have to do things...

"I’m sorry to tell you, but the hard reality of life is that you have to do things you don’t love, and sometimes you have to do things you hate." - Unknown

Often times, I come face to face with having to do things that I dislike, and in the past I choose to ignore those elements and emotions by drinking... and I use to drink a lot. In fact, every 2 days, I'd find some liquor and drink to cloud things that I didn't want to deal with. However, eventually life becomes so thick with issues that you can't ignore them anymore with drinking or excuses... you have to face them head-on and get off the bench.

I recognize certain realities right now, and one of them is having to do things that I really hate doing. When I was in my teens, I kicked ass in school so that I could have a good GPA that would get me into college. There were many nights that I stayed up way past midnight studying, in fact, I remember being up until the sun came up the next day... studying not out of love but out of survival. There would be many other times in my life that I pushed happiness aside and focused simply on the elements that would get me to where I needed to be. It wasn't about want it, it was about need... and I won't lie... I hated every minute of it. It's funny though because I remember that it was out of hatred that I ended up wanted to learn the Bass Guitar and Weight Training. It wasn't a hatred of myself, it was my hatred of others, society, and life... I pushed myself to be better so SOCIETY wouldn't get the best of me. It's a convoluted view, doing what you should be loving but doing it out of a hatred of others. I learned the Bass Guitar, because I wanted to master an instrument so that my brother wouldn't best me in the Drums. And I started Weight Training, so other males wouldn't think they could openly disrespect me without a challenge.

Now after this weekend, I find myself being urged or motivated to hate... simply because I want to survive... and because I know doing this will get me to where I want to be in life. I know hatred or dislike can cloud our judgement, but that hatred can be turned into an focused motivation and intensity to pursue change... to change for the better. Change is never easy... but often times its a necessary thing so that the future can be what we want and need.

I'm getting off the bench now and it's time to go back to work!!!